Better Than Black-and-White TV

It was the Summer of Love. 1967. I was about 10 years old. We had a black-and-white 19-inch television with four channels to watch. (Five if your had a lot of tin foil and were patient and creative with the rabbit ears!) Everyone in MY neighborhood had a B&W TV.

Then the magic day came ... the 25-inch color console was delivered to the house. No one home but me. The TV guy delivered it, set it up (NO remote control or cable, hadn’t been invented). Then he turned it on ... Technicolor! Kirk Douglas (Michael Douglas’ DAD!) was fighting some Roman gladiators and the blood was RED! Whoa, Daddy! This was amazing. For three hours I was glued to the set.

One morning I invited Pat McCarthy to breakfast. He is the author of “The Nordstrom Way,” the best-selling business book on customer service and sales effectiveness. I asked him what the secret of his overwhelming sales success was. You see, Pat had consistently sold more than $1 million a year in men’s clothes in the downtown Seattle Nordstrom store. The next closest person sold half that amount. Pat was consistently the store’s top performer year after year.

“It requires becoming other-centered,” he told me. “That is to say, you have got to care more than most people are willing to. People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”

It has taken me 10 years of study, reflection, trial and error and observation to understand fully what Pat meant that day. Here it is as simply as I can make it. The 10 Differences of a different life:

OTHER-Centered

1. Actively listening to others
2. Working to understand
3. Empathy
4. Creative caring
5. Appreciation
6. Gratitude
7. Responsibility
8. Optimism
9. Joy
10. Hard Work

SELF-Centered

1. Talking about yourself
2. Waiting to talk
3. Narcissism
4. Indifference
5. Criticism
6. Cynicism
7. Blame
8. Pessimism
9. Depression
10. Sloth

As a kid, the SELF-centered column came naturally to me. I have invested the last 25 years of my life working to live in the OTHER-Centered column.

How? Reading books, associating with positive people, attending seminars, finding mentors, writing in my journal, listening to CDs, and thinking, reflecting upon and keeping what works and getting rid of what doesn’t.

My friend Andrew Bennett said to me during a team-building seminar we were facilitating in 1995, “Mark, it’s not about you!”

Ouch! You know what? He was right. I need to take my ego out of the equation in my relationships with others. When I do, the results are amazing. Here’s what will happen:

• Other people want to spend more time with you but don’t know why;
• People open up and tell you things they don’t tell their barber/nail person, spouse or best friend;
• They give you their business, their time and their friendship;
• Your kids WANT to spend time with you;
• Your bank account increases;
• You have more joy in your life; and
• You will live longer.

Earl Nightingale asked a powerful question years ago: “How can I increase my service to others?”

He went on to say: “Understanding that my income is in direct proportion to the quality and quantity of service rendered, do you want to earn more? Serve more! Like the woodstove, you will get back what you put in. Want more heat? Load up the stove. It’s that simple.”

OK, say you want to change. You are convinced. But how? Answer, “One thing at a time!” Go to my Website, www.mattesonavenue.com, and click on the new PDF Special Report entitled “Dashboard Decree.” It’s free. It will show you the way. Try it for 30 days. If anything positive happens, try it again for 30 more days. It’s amazing. It works!

Is it worth the effort? You bet. I promise you one thing. Technicolor is much better than black and white, especially on my 54-inch LCD big screen with surround sound!

Now, how do you get those other 532 channels? Say, how do you program this TIVO anyway? I want to record that new Michael Douglas movie …

Mark Matteson of the Pinnacle Service Group can be reached by phone at 877/672-2001, by fax at 425/745-8981, by e-mail at [email protected] or visit his Website at www.mattesonavenue.com.